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What can I do to better my chances?
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Know yourself -
Being comfortable with your body is the first step to becoming orgasmic. You may want to try
masturbating if you've never done it before.
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Make sure that you are in the mood -
You should feel relaxed and comfortable so that you can fully appreciate
sexual intimacy with yourself or your partner. If you find that you are angry at your partner, it may not be the best time to
engage in sexual intimacy.
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Communicate with your partner -
Tell him/her what you find sexually stimulating. Many women can not achieve
orgasm from intercourse. This is not a sexual dysfunction, it just means that your partner has to explore what you find
most pleasurable. Constant clitoral stimulation is required by many women to achieve orgasm, so be sure to tell your
partner to continue stimulation if need be.
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Be adventurous -
Oral sex or manual stimulation of the clitoris may be too infrequent for some women to achieve
orgasm so an alternative method of stimulation is advised. Vibrators are a good way to massage the clitoris during
intercourse.
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Be positive -
Some women go through a stage of arousal where they are not becoming further excited. Many feel that
this is where their arousal will end and that they will not be able to achieve an orgasm. Once a woman believes that she is
not going to be able to have an orgasm, that is often exactly what happens.
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Touch yourself -
It is okay for you to touch yourself during sexual intimacy with a partner. Self stimulation is
encouraged, and often accentuates the feeling of intercourse.
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Painful Intercourse (Women) - Why do I experience pain during intercourse?
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- Sex should never be painful. If you are having pain during sex, stop. Sex is supposed to be pleasurable, and pain
indicates that something is wrong. In many cases, your partner's actions can cause pain, such as going too fast or
penetrating from an awkward position. Never hesitate to ask your partner to slow down or move to make you more
comfortable.
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- Another common cause of pain during sex is the lack of natural lubrication in the vagina. If you are not aroused during
sex, you may experience this, although women often do not produce enough lubrication on their own. Try using a
water-based lubricant or purchase lubricated condoms if you think this is the problem.
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- Failure of the vagina and uterus to respond to sexual arousal can also cause discomfort. The vagina may be too snug for
intercourse or the uterus may not be raised so that the penis comes in contact with the cervix during penetration.
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- The muscles near the vaginal opening may also be the cause of some discomfort during intercourse. Various problems
can occur depending on the state of these muscles. Vaginismus is a condition in which these muscles are extremely tight
which causes intercourse to be painful and in some cases impossible. The way to check to see if vaginismus is a problem
is for the woman to examine herself with her fingers. If she feels that the vaginal walls are much tighter than normal, then
it may be vaginismus. Vaginismus is not a permanent condition. It is usually caused by nervousness or anxiety. Make
sure that you engage in foreplay before intercourse. This will help you produce a healthy amount of lubrication, and
should make you more relaxed. If foreplay does not help you lubricate, try a lubricant (water-based if you are using a
condom). Try to reduce the pressure to perform. Fortu nately, few women have vaginismus so severely that they have to
go for treatment. For most women, it is just important to relax.
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- Any inflammation of the vagina has the potential to cause problems during sexual intercourse. Infections of the vaginal
region due to yeast, herpes, etc. can make intercourse uncomfortable. Creams, fabric or perfumes may also cause
irritation which makes intercourse painful. It is best to examine the vaginal area or the products that are being used to
determine whether they are causing this problem.
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- Difficulty with intercourse may also be experienced by women for whom it is the first time having sex. Breakage of the
hymen and other sensitive tissue can cause discomfort during penetration. The best advice is to take it slow, or begin with
forms of penetration other than intercourse.
For more information on improving
Sexual Pleasure
click here.
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